A ton off my shoulders

I feel slightly better about things. I managed to somehow rearrange some things and used my paycheck to buy a ton of pellets so we can start to have some heat in the house. As for my furnace, the engine or whatever it is is dead apparently. So Im still stuck there. But after loading and unloading a ton of pellets today I feel like I can conquer the rest of my daunting tasks and not be taken down.

My youngest ended up sick during visitation with Him. He told me he was going to head to prompt care with the lil one since the drs office was closed. Needless to say when I got done work that night he told me he didnt go, didnt have "time", translation, he didnt want to get off his ass. I spent the rest of the night in the hospital, waiting around. Some meds and we were discharged, only for me to notice the next morning and this morning as well, that lil one seems ot be having poor circulation. Lips are purple when waking up and skin is dusky all over, especially in hands and feet and face. Takes a couple hours before the skin pinkens back up to normal. I dont know if this was happening during the days he had the children, he probably wouldnt have noticed if it was, so Im left with the fun of tracking down the on call dr and figuring things out. Lil one has a history of pneumonia and croup on a monthly basis, it seemed to have stopped right before this past spring. Couple that with the asthma and heart murmur it could be an infection or something else. When I brought this up to him, his response was, "ok". No other words, no concerns, nothing. Eventually he told me to do whatever and just text him about later. -_-

So Im waiting around for school to get out so I can take the kids into the backyard and rake up leaves and throw them in the piles. Just have some fun and make memories. Im excited to be turning the back shed into a big play area for the kids. Up till this past april it was his. So now there is this big empty place that has a wood stove to heat it, just waiting around to be used. Im thinking about moving the gym mats and putting the sandtable and the lil slide and maybe even the kids trampoline in there since its big enough. That way winter wont be such a drag on the days its too cold for them to actually play outside, and the toys indoors are 'boring' lol. Anything to keep our spirits up. And to keep going.