I feel like Ive been bombarded lately from every direction. I can handle it, but it makes me wish I could just have a breather. I guess things are really not that much different from before. He never helped with much around the house. If something broke usually it was his brother who would come fix it or someone from my family. Needless to say my family may be handy occasionally, but they all have lives and are busy and just cant drop everything and come help me. And obviously his family havent had a thing to do with me since I kicked him out. Blood is blood and they sided with him. Even with them seeing him choke me and hit me and having them pull him off of me, well despite that, in their eyes he is a saint.
I have no idea how to fix my truck, how to repair my roof, how to fix my furnace, how to install the dishwasher, how to fix the hole he left in the wall the night before I finally became brave enough to kick his butt out. Ive been soldiering on and basically rednecking my way through everything. Becoming handy with a screwdriver and ducttape. But the projects are piling up and my patience is stretched thin. But I have no choice but to keep on keeping on.
Ive made quite a few changes in my life. Done things I never thought Id do, or ever even considering doing. Teetering back n forth on what my views are, what Ive always felt was was right or wrong. Coming to find who I am now. And realizing how very different I am then I had thought I was. But thats a good thing. People change. I never really had a chance to find who I was. I went from school, to marriage, to mom, to victim. But not anymore. I am important and I have three amazing children to show that life is not only about surviving, its about living.
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